In keeping with our Horror House theme for March, here is some of my research for my manuscript concerning obscure horror house things because this world is a big beautiful bag of weird (all images courtesy of interwebs).
Z is for ZARF
ZARF: It’s to keep your fingers from burning off while you drink your potion.
Y is for YEW
YEW TREE: For the inner demon-child in you. Or it.
X is for XANTHIPPE
XANTHIPPE STATUE: To honor and welcome the inner banshee in all of us.
W is for WIDOW’S WALK
WIDOW’S WALK: I feel like it’s less awful than it sounds. Kind of like a mini-lighthouse on top of your home.
V is for VOMITORIUM
VOMITORIUM: Not as bad as it sounds. It’s just that exit way leading out of an amphitheater.
U is for UCALEGON
UCALEGON: Because nothing says “Welcome Home!” like a neighbor whose house is on fire.
T is for TILBURY
TILBURY: Because so much is riding on your zebras.
S is for SOLARIUM
SOLARIUM: AKA Greenhouse, orangery, or sunroom. It’s like an oven for your whole body.
R is for RUINS
RUINS: Better yet, underwater ruins at the bottom of my private lake with an underground river that connects to my basement poolbrary (See NATATORIUM, below).
Q is for QUARTREFOIL
QUARTREFOIL: These were hidden all over my hometown. I’m still convinced they were portals to a pocket universe.
P is for PORTICULLIS
PORTICULLIS: This is NOT what I pictured this word to look like. I’d call it deathfence.
O is for OCCULUS
OCCULUS: I cannot count the number of nightmares these windows give me.
N is for NATATORIUM
NATATORIUM: And if it was drained like this basement one, I’d fill the shallow end with books and the deep end with pillows. My poolbrary.
M is for MOTHERHOOD HELPER
MOTHERHOOD HELPER: I don’t know the name for it, but sign me up.
L is for LANTERN
LANTERN: I don’t know what it lanterns but I want eighteen of them.
K is for KEWPIE DOLL
KEWPIE DOLL: Just kidding. These are the stuff of nightmares.
J is for JIGGUMBOB
JIGGUMBOB: No thank you, please.
I is for INGLENOOK
INGLENOOK: Where you go to get warm or burned.
H is for HALLWAY
HALLWAY: Sometimes you should stay in your room.
G is for GARRET
GARRET: Like an attic, but worse because you’re convinced it will tidy up nicely for a fifth bedroom.
F is for FRIENDSHIP BALLS
FRIENDSHIP BALLS: AKA Gazing Balls, Looking Balls, or Butler Balls.
E is for ENFILADE
ENFILADE: A series of adjoining rooms in which the doors align and you’ll probably get stabbed.
D is for DOVCOTE
DOVCOTE: Where the doves go.
C is for CUPOLA
CUPOLA: Like a belvedere only more so.
B is for BELVEDERE
BELVEDERE: Not just an 80’s butler, but so much more than a cupola.
A is for ANTEROOM
ANTEROOM: You can wait here. You can wait here and you can like it.